For many couples, going on that first holiday together is considered a major milestone in the relationship.
Like any holiday, your first romantic trip together requires a lot of planning, and isn’t immune to disaster!
Whether you’re heading to Blackpool or to the Bahamas, the following tips should help you and your partner make the most of that first holiday together:
- Manage your expectationsNo doubt you’ve dreamed of what your first holiday together will be like. You may have visions of you holding hands and skipping across the beach and dining in the fanciest restaurants – but your other half may be planning a full-on adventure weekend full of ziplines, white water rafting and sleeping rough in the woods!
When expectations don’t match, couples are bound to clash. So, before you jump on a flight together, talk about what you want to get out of the holiday.
If you’re both on completely different pages then tips 2 and 3 may help you out.
- Make compromisesWhen you’re both hoping to get different things out of the holiday, an easy way
Whether you’re recently separated, bereaved or have been single for a long time, you may have some worries about starting a new relationship.
In this article, we’ll go through some of the common worries late in life daters may have and offer some tips and advice. But to start off, here are a few key facts:
- In a US survey of unmarried 57-85 year olds, 14% said they were in a dating relationship
- The number of men over the age of 65 who are getting married has increased 25%
- Cohabitation is becoming increasingly common among older adults without marriage
Do we want the same thing?
When entering into a new relationship, you need to be honest with yourself and your new partner about your intentions. You may want something casual, or you may be hoping for something long-lasting. Whatever your intentions, be sure to discuss these with your new partner – but also be open to change. You never know what the future holds and your expectations for the relationship may alter over time.
Will sex be the
Early romantic relationships are an important learning phase for everyone. They help us figure out how we relate to others, understanding our needs and desires, and recognising what does and doesn’t work. These early relationships play a big part in how we navigate future relationships .
If you identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans, or any other status than cisgender hetero, you may find that there are additional obstacles to meeting potential partners and forming those first relationships
One of the first barriers you might face is a lack of potential partners, with a smaller pool of people to choose from. You might also find it harder to be open about your sexuality, making potential partners that bit harder to find .
And, despite great efforts to drag public attitudes into the modern age, young LGBTQ people do still risk facing stigma and discrimination. If you don’t yet feel able to talk about your sexuality with your friends and family, you may find yourself without a strong support system . Looking for support online can start to remedy
The modern day workplace can feel like a highly pressurised environment. Demanding workloads, long and uncertain hours, plus the general stresses associated with work can easily spill over into family life, with negative consequences.
Research shows that if you are unhappy at work, you’re likely to bring that negativity home with you and your couple relationship can suffer.
The opposite is also true: if you’re unhappy with your relationship, your productivity and efficiency in the workplace can decrease.
One way to start to improve your couple relationship and your workplace relationships is to get a better work-life balance.
It may seem like a difficult task, but even small changes to your weekly routine can make a difference.
Try and do each of the activities in our Work-Life Balance Pledge at least once each week. Make a note of what you’ve managed to achieve and why. Then decide how it could be done differently the following week.
Give it a go and tell us how you get on in the comments below!
The Work-Life Balance Pledge
- I will take a full lunch break away from my desk
- I will text
While this transition can be exciting, retirement comes with its own set of unique challenges that will affect your couple relationship.
Adjusting to retired life together
If you’ve been with your partner for a long time, you’ve probably settled into a routine. You wake up, have breakfast together, head off to work, come home in the evening, eat dinner and so on. The most time you probably spent together was at weekends. But now that you’re retired, you will be around each other a lot more.
Suddenly having to spend so much time together with your partner can be difficult to cope with. Recent research conducted by Skipton Building Society found that 40% of retired couples had to learn how to live with each other again and 25% said that managing their relationship was trickier than they imagined it would be.
One way couples are easing themselves through this transitional period if by choosing a gradual retirement instead of a direct shift from full-time employment to full-time retirement.
Skipton Building Society’s research also found that nearly a third (29%) of couples feel that their expectations of retirement are different.
But it’s not as dire as you’d expect. Research has found that 47% of married women aged between 66 and 71 are sexually active and 60% of men and women over the age of 50 are happy with their sex lives.
That’s not to say that mature couples don’t experience issues in the bedroom.
Health and the menopause
For many mature couples, health problems have a big effect on their sex lives. NATSAL research recently found that 29% of men aged between 65 and 74 feel that their health has affected their sex life. In comparison, just 17% of men in all other age groups feel this way.
For some women, sexual desire can increase after menopause – possibly because they are no longer afraid of falling pregnant, or because they are no longer feeling stressed out by their menstrual cycle.
Post-menopausal women can experience some difficulties that may disrupt sexual activity such as hot flushes, night sweats, vaginal dryness and painful uterine contractions at orgasm.
Some women also experience reduced feelings of desire and can go through periods of mourning as they come to terms with the changes to their and
The online tool uses relationship science and interactive animations to encourage users to set boundaries, communicate effectively and understand their emotions. The site also looks at sex and intimacy within a broader context of dating and forming relationships.
‘The site covers matters such as “What kind of relationship am I in?”, “Do I have to have sex?” and “Can I be friends with my ex?”’ says OnePlusOne Director Penny Mansfield. ‘Our hope is that we can answer the questions of young adults while showing them how to improve the quality of their relationships.’
OnePlusOne has identified a need for young adults to be given more education on couple relationships. Recent research findings have shown that many young adults feel that they are missing out on this when at school and some are turning to pornography to learn more about sex.
‘It’s a myth to assume that the only thing young adults are interested in is sex,” continues Mansfield. ‘They care very much about their relationships as we discovered recently at an event we attended held by the National Children’s Bureau (NCB).’
In a snap poll of 166 people, we at theCoupleConnection asked if any
Shared parental leave could be the answer to a number of tricky issues like sharing childcare and other housework, but recent studies have shown that it may not be as straightforward as first thought.
Since April 2015, parents have been entitled to take 12 months of shared leave. In the past, dads could only take two weeks’ parental leave but parents can now choose how to divide up the first year between themselves.
We know that the transition to parenthood is one of the toughest hurdles a couple can face together (though it doesn’t have to hurt!). Shared parental leave can make this transition easier, but there are some practical and financial factors to consider.
Managing the demands of a new born baby, along with all the existing household chores, is a lot to ask of one parent alone. Shared parental leave means that both parents can sometimes be at home together and the load can be shared during the day.
It can also help new dads – who often experience the transition differently to mums – adjust better to the demands of parenting (Wisensale, 2001). One study showed that dads who take parental
There’s something fun about merging your life with your significant other, particularly in the early stages, but it’s important to maintain the qualities that make you who you are as an individual – after all, that’s what your partner fell in love with in the first place.
Having an independent streak doesn’t mean you’re afraid of commitment – people with a strong sense of personal identity can actually be better communicators. They are less defensive, more honest, and more flexible. They find it easier to be open and to put things into perspective .
A strong sense of individuality, then, can mean you have stronger relationships. When you and your partner support and nurture each other’s need for independence, you can start to find a balance that means you’re also happier and more confident in the relationship .
If you’d like to reclaim a bit of independence as a way of strengthening your relationship, you might want to try the following.
1. Spend some time alone
Alone time gives you a chance to recharge and refresh. We all need a bit of solitude and it’s easy to forget this when we get into relationships.
Historically, falling for someone from another culture might have been big trouble, but a lot has changed over the last few decades and people are generally much more accepting of young people’s choices of partner these days.
Research shows that dating across different cultures – which includes different races, ethnicities, or different faiths – has become much more common among young people and carries less stigma than it used to. Some studies have shown that couples from different cultures might be more likely to experience conflict in their relationships.
Talking about these difficulties, however, not only alleviates the conflict but can actually help your relationship to develop and grow stronger . In other words, having differences can be a really positive thing, as long as you celebrate them. Making an effort to understand and appreciate each other’s backgrounds can be an enriching experience that also helps you maintain your relationship quality.
If you have a partner whose religious beliefs are different to your own, you may find your differences are particularly pronounced, which could lead to more disagreements that are harder to resolve . This may be because we often develop our religious beliefs from
While expressing your needs and feelings in a positive way to your significant other is a good foundation for resolving conflicts and building a healthy relationship, these skills may not be as strong a predictor of couples’ happiness as experts once thought.
In an Internet-based study involving 2,201 participants referred by couples counselors, scientists decided to test, head to head, seven “relationship competencies” that previous researchers and marital therapists found to be important in promoting happiness in romantic relationships. The idea was to rank the skills in order of importance to start building data on which aspects of relationships are most important to keeping them healthy. In addition to communication and conflict resolution, the researchers tested for sex or romance, stress management, life skills, knowledge of partners and self-management to see which ones were the best predictors of relationship satisfaction. Couples were asked questions that tested their competency in all of these areas and then queried about how satisfied they were with their relationships. The researchers correlated each partner’s strengths and weaknesses in each area with the person’ relationship satisfaction.
(MORE: Let’s Spend Some Time Apart: Long-Distance Relationships Are Deeper)
Not surprisingly, those who reported
After 30 years of working with couples and researching how people repaired their relationships, I suddenly realized that we had really reached a pivotal moment; all our studies, stories, and the science had come together, and we were in the midst of a revolution—a new way of truly understanding romantic love. Finally we can grasp the laws of love—and they make sense!
We have cracked the code of love and have found the pathway to the relationships we long for. You can create a fulfilling, safe-haven relationship, restoring the romantic love bond, beginning now:
1. Abandon the out-of-date idea that love is something that just happens to you.
All the new science tells us that romantic love is no longer a mystery. It makes perfect sense. You can learn its laws. You have more control over this riot of emotion than you think! What you understand, you can shape. The first step is to decide to learn about love and the new science of bonding.
2. Every day, try openly reaching out to someone and asking for their attention or affection.
Accept that you are a mammal and that love is an ancient,
Dating, sex, and romance are a standard part of many young people’s lives. However, most of us who’ve been through it or are going through it will recognise that sexuality can be very complicated and highly personal.
If you are a young person with a long-term illness or disability, it might feel like there’s a whole extra bundle of complications thrown in.
Disability can be associated with factors like social stigma and a reliance on the support of others, all of which can get in the way of how you meet new people and develop relationships . You may also have important routines around medication and treatments that affect how you manage your free time
Many young disabled people have also expressed fear around being rejected by potential partners, worrying that they might not be considered attractive or won’t be thought of as a romantic partner .
Getting on just fine
However, despite evidence to suggest things might be trickier, some research suggests that disabled people are getting on just fine when it comes to sex and relationships.
While some studies showed relatively low sexual activity among young disabled people , others
The study showed that the decision not to have children is usually a conscious one, rather than something that ‘just happens’. It’s usually something that’s arrived at over a length of time and it’s an ongoing choice. This is particularly true for heterosexual couples, who often have to choose to continue using contraception, and avoid unplanned pregnancy.
How is the decision made?
By the time couples are having their first conversations about children, they have often already given years of thought to the matter. If both know that they don’t want children, it may only take single conversation to form an agreement.
Reasons for opting out of parenthood could include wider factors such as:
- Increased reproductive choices: since the feminist movement of the 1970s, more of us are free to make this choice in the first place 
- More career options for women: childfree women are more likely to be employed in professional and managerial positions 
- Worry about jobs: in one study conducted during the recession of the ‘90s , many men said they had opted out of parenthood due to uncertainty in the labour market.
- Wider society: women in particular referred to concerns
What makes for a healthy romantic relationship differs from couple to couple. Forming a trusting and positive partnership takes effort and time. And unfortunately, it doesn’t just happen overnight. For any relationship to grow strong and stay strong, you need to put in some work. Below are some habits that will help create and maintain a happy and healthy twosome.
Communication is key. It is one of the most important qualities a healthy relationship. However, not everyone knows how to communicate properly … or even communicate at all. Happy and healthy couples have this game down. They vocalize their love for one another, saying “I love you” often and offering compliments. They also discuss the bad instead of sweeping issues under the rug. In order to move forward and grow, you two need to be able to truly talk about your feelings. No matter how awkward or uncomfortable it feels, it will make for a long-lasting and fulfilling relationship.
Aretha Franklin sang a whole song about it, so you know it’s got to be important. Respecting your partner comes in many forms. Maintaining a joyful relationship means respecting your partner’s time, heart,